Troubles Don’t Last Always If…

by
Dr. Gloria "Jo" Floyd (Ph.D., RN)
The Nurses Coach

Are you troubled in many aspects of your nursing life? Do you feel worse and worse every or most days? Have you often or recently thought, “If there is trouble anywhere it will fine me first?” Have you at times been at your wits end? Do you feel that your personal and/or professional life is in shambles? Are you convinced that you are
doomed to your current circumstance? If so, listen up…it doesn’t have to be so. Just trust me and know that troubles don’t last always if…you get focused my friend in the right direction. And know this is not going to be Preaching 101, but rather, key steps to move trouble from your life.

Here’s The Scoop

If you are doing anything in your life my nursing buddy that is worthwhile every now and then some rain will fall. Life just is not going to always be a bowl of cherries or better a bowl of strawberries ready to dip in chocolate.

Ask around and you will find that you are not the only nurse who feels that Satan or somebody or something worse is sitting on top of your house, standing on your desk or running down the hallway after you, where ever you nurse, shop or eat. It is just not so. How do I know? Cause he is over my house, office, car, etc….that’s a joke folks. So what I am trying to say is life is not always going to be sweet. At work you may find that things are not going right. The boss, who could be you, is running into brick walls, acting out of it and clearly off center. Supplies didn’t arrive, the equipment doesn’t work, some apathetic nurse didn’t show up for work, the check from your employer/client bounced, your clients are cranky, you are cranky…you get the picture. And what makes it worse is this is a usual day.

Well, don’t get discouraged yet. It could be worse. Your checks could be bouncing, your roof could have blown off, you could be in the situation where you can’t pay your bills, your health is shot and you just got fired. Your relationships could be shattered. Your
mother could disown you. And your friends could be not returning your calls. You could have just been offered a head nurse position or told your organization was bankrupt and about to close. Someone could have just robbed your house and stole your car. Census could be down. You could be over weight, and your mother-in-law or most dreaded relative has asked to move in!! No, all of this could not be your situation right now. So in other words, things could get worse.

Seriously, things could get worse. However, I recognize that what you are feeling hurts, pulls you down, fags you out and that to you…your troubles are no laughing matter, whether they be at home or work. Therefore, here I am going to give you my formula for:

bulletGetting past the daily hurdles
bulletKeeping your best face forward
bulletTaking your lumps better
bulletStaying focused in times of trouble
bulletPlanning for your worse days, and
bulletTrampling troubles every time they come your way.

Step One: Shake Out Your Blessings and Give Thanks

If you get up or arrive at work feeling what else could go wrong, just keep that
thought; shake out your blessings and give thanks. For what? – for how bad it is not. Trust me when things get bad, they can really get bad. So, every time you think this is the worst of the worst, re-kindle your spirit by saying “This is difficult but is could be worse.” And just stop and think about other ways this could have played out. To make
it simple, say you had one staff member not show up – remember they all could have walked out. You had a fender bender – you could have been critically injured or died. No matter how many times you are traumatized daily, shake out your blessing and give thanks!! It works.

Step Two: Take Each Day One At A Time

Don’t let me hear you say it. Don’t start traumatizing over things that haven’t happed yet, like “I know she is probably not going to show up tomorrow either.” “I’ll probably have a worse wreck next time.”  “My spouse is probably going to…” You get the picture. The
“troubles” you have today are enough for today. Don’t let yourself get carried away on a tide of “Oh, woe is me!” Instead, recognize that today is all you are promised and make the most of it…then plan to assure tomorrow is better.

Step Three: Build Your Foundation On A Rock

If your life is full of personal and professional troubles all the time let me suggest that you step back and look at your life’s foundation. Is your emotional, financial, social, physical and mental foundation built on a rock or on an unsound, weak, unstable hill of sand? How are you centering your spirit? Do you have a power source that is not washed away with the first rainfall? What are your solid foundations?  Where do you renew your faith? Are your values, attitudes and beliefs grounded in your Almighty? Are you traveling through your personal and professional life without a strong anchor? Are you feeding your spirit? Or is your whole life hinged on sinking and easily washed away sand? If so this has to change.

Get your spirit back. Find it in solitude, reflection, prayer, meditation, counseling, a church, mosque or synagogue, a spirit-centered friend, write or call me, read a bible or see a chaplain, priest, rabbi, or other spiritual leader. In other words, build your soul’s foundation up and on a spiritual rock that can carry you through your troubled times.

Step Four: Put On Your Prescriptive Armor

Troubles become like ants in our lives if we put on our armor. So what armor would work for you in your nursing life? Think about the things you need to enrich your total life’s circumstance and then set out to assure that your armor stays intact. And let me suggest some armor every one of us should be sure we have:


Prescriptive Armor #1 – Wisdom


Think through the big things that can trouble your life. List some of them right now on a blank sheet of paper. They might read something like this:

bulletPoor Health
bulletDivorce
bulletA Difficult Supervisor ?Loss of a Loved One
bulletNot Enough Money ?Managed Care
bulletA Family Crisis ?Cost Containment
bulletA Catastrophic Injury ?Etc.

Stop and think about how wisdom can help you go through these and other calamities. Wisdom – can be a great armor. It can help you see the worse case scenario. It can help you in your search for the resources you need. It can steer you in the right direction. It can chart a course away from your troubles and toward your rock – your foundation – your spiritual tower, and out of perceived darkness into promised light.

So what am I saying to you? I am only suggesting that before trouble befalls you or is at your door, build an armor foundation. Cull out of your mind what your resources are. Ask and answer in writing to deepen today your armor.

Prescriptive Armor #2 – Resources

Who are my resources for assistance, encouragement, support, intimacy and love? Start with those you have helped and guided. List them all now.

Prescriptive Armor #3 - Finances

What financial options can I count on to help me deal with or manage any financial crises that may befall me? Planning ahead is a good beginning. Don’t stop until you have listed at least six sources you might be able to turn to.

Prescriptive Armor #4 – Relationships


What steps should I be taking on a daily basis to assure stability in my relationships? Try more sharing, giving, helping, nurturing, being loving, kind, available and related.


Prescriptive Armor #5 – Investments

What investments do I make now personally and professionally to stem the tide of troubles in my life? You might answer savings accounts, stocks, bonds, certificates of deposit, budgeting, penny pinching, etc.


Prescriptive Armor #6 – Credentials

What credentials should I work on now via education, continuing education, research, writings, on the job training, and/or the world wide web to keep me on top of the heap – the most marketable, needed and desired professionally?


Prescriptive Armor #7 – Mentorship

Do I need to seek out mentors in my personal and professional world? What could a mentor help me do, prepare for, or grow in? And what troubles could I ward off by mentoring to others?


Prescriptive Armor #8 – Ask, Seek and Knock – A Lot

Ask yourself is there something I need that I have a source for if I just “ask”? Where can I “seek” for a solution today for a particular trouble I have? Is there a door upon which I could “knock” but have not? Don’t, in other words, have a solution to your troubles and not always stop and think “where could I ask, seek and/or knock”? It works each and every time.

So go forth, seek out, and use your prescriptive armor daily. It is nearby for the grasping and it will help you solve many of the troubles you run into. First seek wisdom. Know your available resources.  Plan financially. Build strong and solid relationships. Invest wisely.
Stay maximally credentialed. Seek our great mentors and mentor back.

Step Five – Remember That Troubles Don’t Last If You…

bulletFirst do not harm. Always, always be caught on the side of right. I really believe that what goes around comes around. Don’t want to ever experience a particular harm or trouble? Let me suggest that you never do that level of harm.
bulletTreat everyone right. I know sometimes we see people who treat others badly all the time who appear to have everything going for them. I have even at times felt that way myself. But don’t believe it.   In the end your and my my Almighty has the last say.
bulletTake Nothing For Granted. Know that life can throw you a loop and prepare for it. Don’t get caught with your guard down. If you are living or working in a difficult situation stop right now and write out the possible troubles your current circumstance could deal you and get prepared. Write next at least three tactics you can use if that circumstance shows up to haunt you.
bulletFind Some Problem Solving Buddies. Know some other folk who are in your or a better situation? Hang tight with them. Be a sounding board for each other. Sit down in your positive moments and strategize for any expected trouble. Don’t get negative; stay positive and work as a team to chare a more benevolent course.
bulletStrive to Keep Peace Everyday – 24/7/365. It is quite easy to fight unnecessary battles. But remember, they take lots of energy. Be sure the troubles in your life aren’t coming because you are not always in search of a dignified peace. Move away from “I have to win and he/she/they have to lose” if that is a part of your skit. Life is much too short to have ongoing and routine fights. Get Peace! It feels much
better than the alternative. And don’t let others in your life get outside of peace….help them understand the benefits in it…Focus = Peace!
bulletStop Talking and Start Giving. Why, because I have found the more I and other people give the more we each receive! At work and at home stretch and expand to give more of you to others. You will be shocked to find that when you help others meet their unique needs or get past their troubles, the more the world watches out for you. You will notice that people watch your blind side, warn you of upcoming curves, open doors for you and help you and me…maximally when troubled times do come. So give, care, share, assist, encourage, mentor and prop up others and the same will come your way multifold.
bulletProvoke No One To Wrath. An untroubled house is usually found with those who trouble not or least. Do you know any folks in your world that seem to always be in an upheaval or fighting with someone? Do you hate to see them coming because you know you are going to hear something negative, naughty or unkind? Have you
often worried about that person becoming a victim in a fight, drive by shooting or participant in a road or work rage incident? I have and it is a worrisome situation. Let’s you and I not go there. People today have lots of stress so our goal is not to increase it.
bulletLive Up To Your Promises. Nothing brings trouble faster than promises not kept. Before we volunteer, we need to know that we can deliver. Thus, let us think twice before we jump on the help bandwagon. Aren’t we busy enough? Shouldn’t we plan ahead for what promises we will make? When you jot down your goals later or today for the next year, decide on your work and giving priorities. Do look at what you enjoy doing. Forecast now how much giving time you really have. Where do you want to spend it? People you like to be with? Or wherever you volunteer without thinking? You get the picture.
bulletLook For The Lessons In Your Troubles. I often hear people who have had life threatening or catastrophic illness note that the illness was the best thing that ever happened to them. Have you heard such statements as well? What most of these individuals are trying to impart to us is that sometimes our greatest eye openers come from adversity. So when troubles come your way, step back from them and see what the “Great One” is trying to impart to you. What lesson is in your most recent adversity? Did you need the last calamity to get you on the right track? I am letting any trouble that comes my way grow me up for the next great challenge.
bulletPray, Meditate and Think Positive Thoughts. Now you can call me Miss Pray, Meditate and Positive Thoughts! There are worse things, you know, that one could be called. I have found that the more troubles, traumatized, downtrodden, or down in the dumps I get I go all out to pray, meditate and to have positive thoughts. I put on the whole armor or my belief and get down to the basics. How about you? Let me suggest that if you get overly troubled at work and at home that you fight it with all your energy. Pray, meditate and think positive thoughts. Some great thoughts are:
bulletI can do this
bulletI will survive this
bulletI am healed
bulletI believe I will succeed
bulletI know that this, too, shall soon pass
bulletI can survive it because it can’t kill me
bulletGod is on my side
bulletThe worst that can happen is…and I can survive that!
bulletThis is just helping me to be stronger
bulletEtc.

And don’t think I haven’t had “big troubles”, I have. I have had “big” hurts. I have experienced “major” financial hurdles. I have “lost” my dad, a great friend and other things. I have experienced “huge” disappointments. I have had a “cancer” diagnosis. I have been the victim of “imperfect” surgeries and “all” the calamities that go with
them. I have been perhaps like you, deeply, deeply troubled but through it all even as I write today, I thank God for my blessings. It is not always easy. Many don’t have a strong faith, believe in God or have bounce-back potential. If you are one of them, hang on. Learn to pray meditate and think positive thoughts. And work on forgiveness, tolerance, patience and maximal love.

In Summary – Love, Love and Love Some More would be my summary point for you. If your work environment and/or home environment has deeply hurt, troubled and/or traumatized you, fall back on your great innate capacity to love, love and love some more. It may be hard because what happened to you could have been catastrophic. It could have hurt you to your core. It could have hurt your reputation, caused you financial ruin, thwarted your trust, made you a laughing stock, caused you to be fired, treated you unfairly, changed your future, damaged your soul and/or pained you endlessly but…but you must allow healing through love to get past it. I know from which I speak because I have felt that much hurt. I have faced many troubles. I have felt the depths of despair…but I know that you and I can get past our deepest troubles. We can return to our unique mountaintop if we can just hold to – rise up and understand…that “Troubles Don’t Last Always If We Just…Just Meet Them Head On…and take them Step by Step with our eyes focused on our sources of strength. And so until the next time – keep on keeping on and much “trouble solving” to you and you and me, too!!

Dr. Gloria "Jo" Floyd, Ph.D., RN, The Nurses Coach is a nationally recognized speaker, consultant, author and survival strategist working throughout the united states who resides in San Antonio. You may contact her by  email at DrGloriaJoFloyd@ncehs.com.

2000, Dr. Gloria "Jo" Floyd, The Nurses Coach, NCEHS, 14439 N.W. Military Hwy #108 PMB 615 San Antonio, TX 78231,O=210-698-8700, F=210-698-8701
 

1999-2012, Dr. Gloria "Jo" Floyd, NCEHS, 14439 N.W. MILITARY HWY #108 PMB 615
SAN ANTONIO, TX 78231,O=210-698-8700, F=210-698-8701

[O] 210-698-8700, [F] 210-698-8701,
email:  info@ncehs.com; www.ncehs.com; or www.DrGloriaJoFloyd.com
2012 All Rights Reserved

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